| It is inevitable that people including
ourselves are going to do bad or stupid things. The question this
understated fact elicits is, "When these things happen, what
should our response be?" The Bible is quite clear about this
although we may not always like the clarity or wish to abide by
it. Simply put, "We are to love them!"
The apostle Paul instructs us, "Bless those who persecute
you; bless and do not curse them" (Romans 12:14). "Do
not repay anyone evil for evil, but take thought for what is
noble in the sight of all" (Romans 12:17). Paul was explaining
to the Romans, and now us, what he understood of the teachings
of Jesus.
In our Gospel lesson for today in Matthew 18 we have instructions
from Jesus that are all about loving each other, in this case,
in instances where things are not going well. This is not a teaching
we easily like nor is it one we are willingly ready to follow.
We need to put it in some context. In the verses that precede
today's lesson, we are warned in verses 6-7 that if we
cause little ones to stumble, our punishment will be forthcoming.
In the parable of the 99 sheep and the one who strayed we learn
that everyone is important (Romans 18:10-14). Following this
morning's verses in Matthew 18 we are told there is no minimum
number for the times we are to be forgiving because God has forgiven
us and expects us to extend that forgiveness to others.
This is not to say we are to ignore the deed and the consequences
of it, but we must never lose sight of the fact that our primary
goal is reconciliation and salvation with and for the one who
has failed in some way. Our calling is to preserve the relationship
and save the soul; our job is not to judge the person even if
we have to deal with what the person has done. I heard a television
preacher a few days ago say, "Grace is that moment or period
of time that God gives us in which we can repent before the Final
Judgment."
Part of what we are discussing here involves the discipline
that is necessary for living in a community. This concept of
discipline has fallen on hard times in our society today both
in the world and in the church. I recently was reading about
a book, The Road to Whatever: Middle-class
Culture and the Crisis of Adolescence by Elliot Currie, an
acclaimed sociologist and a Pulitzer Prize finalist. His thesis
is that many young people are not moving toward maturity, success
or prosperity. They have settled for "whatever." Currie
blames this on adults who have taught humiliation rather than
respect and human dignity.
Currie's points about this parallel the points Paul makes
in Romans 13. According to Currie, young people are not being
given enough guidance and are forced to make decisions beyond
their ability to make. Young people are expected to do better
than others and realize their value is based upon performance.
There is no room for failure within a closely defined set of
moral boundaries. If a person has messed up it often is accompanied
with an attitude of no longer caring. This comes from a belief
they will never be good enough so who cares. (Homiletics, September
2005, page 12-13)
The apostle Paul admits in Galatians that none of us can perfectly
live our lives but that this is not an excuse or rationalization
for doing what is wrong. Our job or calling is to love one another
the very best we can. Paul writes in Romans 13:8, "Owe no
one anything, except to love one another; for the one who loves
another has fulfilled the law." As we reach out to others
regardless of age or any other difference we are acknowledging
their worth. At the same moment we are demonstrating that we
have worth as well because we know that God loves us even as
God wants us to love others.
Finally, Paul admits mistakes will be made. This is where Matthew
18:15-20 applies. These verses are not directions about judgment;
they are directions for reconciliation, development and continuation
of community and ultimately, salvation. Here, however, we are
at the primary point of deciding how we are going to respond
when someone fails or makes a mistake.
We are not to shun them or isolate them which is what often
happens. If we truly love them and if we truly care about being
in relationship with them and if we truly care about what ultimately
happens to them we first go to them and confront them with the
particulars in the hope we will be met with confession and repentance.
If this does not work we take two or three others with us in
order that the others can serve as witnesses that an honest attempt
was made at reconciliation. So far this doesn't sound all
that bad.
Let's say the one who failed or who is failing is a member
of the church. Let's say they have not responded well to
the attempts of the small group. Jesus clearly says in Matthew
18:17 that the whole church is to be involved. This is not a
reference to community gossip or judgment. It is a community
of loving people saying to one of its own, "We love you
and want to help you do what God wants for you." To do
this the community has to be in prayer seeking discernment and
wisdom. In some organizations this is called an intervention.
Have you ever heard of anything like this being done in a mainline
church? Not very often.
In our society we want to mind our own business and we truly
want other people to mind their own business and leave us alone.
The key to this is being loving and non-judgmental. People know
the difference between genuine concern and thinking too highly
of one's own self. Theophane the Monk writes in Tales
of a Magic Monastery (NY: Crossroad, 1995): "I walked
up to an old monk and asked him, "What is the audacity of
humility?" This man had never met me before but do you
know what his answer was? To be the first to say I love you."
The worth of any community is determined primarily by how well
its members love each other and by what that love will enable
them to do when one of its own or someone outside its circle
has failed to live up to their potential. Christian response
is dictated by God's response toward us. Unless we totally
deny God, God continues to offer the love and the relationship.
Only when an individual has plainly made it known they want no
part of us can we let them go and then only with hesitation and
the hope they will change their mind. If later they do change
their mind and desire to return we must be ready to welcome them
as the prodigal was welcomed home by his father.
What we sometimes fail to remember in that story is the teaching
the father gave his son before he left home. When the boy came
to his senses he remembered his father's love and wisdom
and realized it was what was best for him.
In our case the whole community of the church has been given
the teaching responsibility and authority to teach as Jesus taught
and to follow His example in caring for others including returning
prodigals. |
